I cockslap morals
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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