i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
