Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
