is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
