He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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