Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize
