she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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