even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Randomize
