She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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