Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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