this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I think I am morally bankrupt
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
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