I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Randomize
