I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
