mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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