ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Randomize
