It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
