the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
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