hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Randomize
