community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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