Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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