I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
