i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Randomize
