I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
