your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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