We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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