dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
