Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
