Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
