Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
