Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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