What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
