I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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