32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
