I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
