me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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