About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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