If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
you made out with another girl for some wings
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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