He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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