I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
