Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize
