this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
My pussy is not your playground.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Randomize
