look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
