My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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