I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
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