I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
