They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Randomize
