Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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