I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Randomize
