weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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