well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
