After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
